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Being Okay with Being Sick

15 Sep

It probably should not have surprised me as much as it did that I would succumb to sickness. After all, this is a mid-sized university with thousands of students. People have been blaming the changing season for the trouble, but I’d be more inclined to moving between 70F classrooms to 85F outsides and back again, or at the very least- stress.

Being one of those annoying souls who “never gets sick,” I was a little distressed when I finally acknowledged this for what it is. Thank you, karma. It’s not as bad as it could be- not the flu or anything so dramatic. ‘Tis but a common cold, I believe. Soar throat, swollen lymph glands in my throat and lots of drainage.

It remains, though, that because I really don’t get sick very often, it was mildly distressing. I won’t go as far as to say I panicked, but I did a lot of mental cataloging as to what could have led to the pain I faced laying in bed Wednesday morning at 3:30, wondering when the fire in my throat would be quenched. Had I eaten something bad, or a series of bad somethings? Did I fail to properly wash my hands after lab sometime last week? Then as I briefly met with a professor, who enlightened me to the fact that he too was sick, I realized it was probably just circumstances.

We’re in a setting where, it’s probably fair to say, students don’t always practice the greatest hygiene, and certainly don’t consider their overall health (if the number of sodas I see guzzled each day is any indication.)

So, no need to search for retribution. No one to blame in this case, not even myself. It’s just a cold. A common one, not the first and probably not the last, but definitely part of the education experience.

http://grooveshark.com/s/The+Lark+Ascending/3QnpIo?src=5

Laughing at Panic and Adding More Food!

25 Aug

So I had a little bit of anxiety Tuesday before classes began on Wednesday. I was nervous and unsure, which you can read about in the second post before this one. I am happy to report that my near-panic was, as I hoped, blown out of proportion and mostly unnecessary!

The most stressful part of classes was/is not having my books yet. There’s nothing I can do about that until I get my financial aid, but the professors, since it’s the beginning of the semester, are coming down pretty hard about… well, everything. It’s a good rule of thumb, I know. Lay your ground rules, be a necessary-jerk at the beginning and be lenient later as opposed to being nice from day one and reining in behavior later. Still, it is added stress to have to internalize their expectations on top of already well-known necessities.

In a segue, here are some pointers for financial aid. My first time around in college, federal loans (subsidized or otherwise) were handled by private banks. After the 2008 financial crisis, the Department of Education took over the handling of student loans, subsidized, un-subsidized, etc. It’s a little scary given the current debt situation in the United States, but I guess it’s better than floundering banks having students by the (fill in your choice of anatomical description) while students have any kind of loans from them; this even though the US now has a AA+ rating. The DoE handles student loans, the loans go directly to the university and whatever is left over after tuition, fees, and other expenses, the university gives to the student in the form of a check. I thought beforehand, even with loan entrance counseling, that the check would be coming from the DOE. Not the case. This is very good because I’m pretty sure that it would be coming about a week later than it already is. So! When you’re signing up for student loans, be sure to check your campus mail or with your FA department about how they will ensure that money gets to you. That way you can get your school texts, or replace that car tire that keeps going flat instead of feeding 50 cents every day to the air pressure machine.

Also! Just in case you did not know this, if at ALL possible, do NOT buy text books in your university bookstore. Good-condition, used books, and earlier editions are almost always available at suppliers like Amazon (or ebay) and there are other providers online. Brand new books, especially when from the bookstore, tend to be marked up 200% or more. Why pay 100 for a text you can get used for 20? Even with shipping, paying 30 is better. AND, I have yet to meet a professor who is not understanding on this point. They are people, and what’s more, they were students at one point. They don’t want you to pay more than you need either. So just don’t do it.

One of my professor’s is an unrepentant mumbler, which adds a little bit of charm to his overall persona, but only a little, and only because I finally tuned my ear to listen to him fluidly. Otherwise it would be downright frustrating. Another professor speaks quietly and nasally so that when he said “kidney model” I thought he said, “kidney bottle.” The class was becoming very advanced very quickly with that misunderstanding.

I have to admit that my 200 level A&P class, which was the most intimidating in some ways, has become my favorite class thus far. It’s challenging and demanding, but I LOVE what I’m learning. And the material IS intelligible. I’m not going to be able to skate through easily without a lot of studying like I did in humanities courses, but it IS doable, and there is something immensely satisfying about learning things with diligence and proper study time. It’s also a big relief that we’re not being assigned any research papers. None at all. It makes me want to ask what the deal is.

So I don’t have a lot of ingredients right now. Or, at least nothing for something heavy, but I’m HUNGRY. So what I DO have is rice, egg, some lettuce, some parm cheese, and some lemon juice. This sounds like the makin’s of somefink GOOD.

So here’s what we’re gonna do:

What you need:
one egg
one cup of rice cooked
a small, small head of lettuce (I am using ONE of an artisan, four-pack, which, when chopped is a TON of lettuce)
1/8 cup of grated parm (this is about three or four T)
1 T of lemon juice
garlic powder
EVOO

Heat about one T (or half a T) of EVOO in a skillet on med-high heat. Scramble your egg and cook it in a thin, tortilla-style crepe. Have fun flipping it over XD (I recommend a wide turner). When it’s fully cooked, cut it in half through the diameter. Then cut the two halves into half-inch wide strips.

Set the egg aside, and toss the rice into the pan to heat it up (unless it’s already warm, in which case, go to the next step!) Add the strips to the rice, and toss it with your lettuce. The lettuce might wilt a bit due to the heat of the egg. Toss in the cheese, lemon juice, and garlic powder to taste.

This is quick, quick, quick, and healthy. There’s a fair amount of protein in brown rice (about 5g in a cup) and this is a pretty low fat.

All told, the calories come to between 600 and 700, but it’s a VERY healthy 600-700. So for a meal, that’s pretty low. Also, I think that the greens would probably perform better as either kale or, maybe spinach, but I didn’t have either of those, and I’m going for honesty. However, I’m eating it right now and it’s pretty good. Give it a try!

Weakness for Posterity

29 Jul

Sometimes in my weakest moments I want to lie down and forget about my problems for a while. Escapism? Maybe. Or maybe it’s taking a few structured minutes to recuperate and regroup.

purported whinging/
This morning is one of those times. Yesterday was the orientation for University of North Alabama transfer students. After scraping the bottom of the barrel for courses, some of which I don’t even need, I was feeling a little low. For work this morning I took the durango, which is a gas guzzling monster of ridiculous proportions. Seriously. 14.9 miles per gallon? Granted, that’s pulling a trailer full of lawn equipment, but I’m barely making money to pay for the gas. Barely. On top of freaking out about the 34mi DTE I had left in the durango with a forty mile round trip, I was nearly run off of the narrow road I was navigating and knocked over someone’s municipal garbage can. Thankfully empty. I finished the yard, only to find that my envelope of payment was nowhere in sight and in addition I had busted the guts out of a 200.00 weedeater that I just bought about a month ago.

Everything started falling apart. I realized that I never have any kind of discretionary spending- I can barely pay the bills I do have. Of the thirty or so places I have applied to since being here, NONE of them have hired (obviously) and the feeling at the moment is that I am just going to be stuck here forever.

This is when it gets really bad and the self-loathing becomes almost tangible. I have a brain. A really good brain. It learns extremely well. I also happen to be pretty empathetic and have some decent people skills to boot.

SO WHY IS THE WORLD DOING ITS DAMNEDEST TO HOLD ME DOWN?

That’s the question that is in my head. I feel like I just need a break. One break. Maybe with some proper class scheduling so I’m not getting thousands of dollars further into debt waiting to be an “actual” student so I can do scheduling properly. Maybe if I had a job I wouldn’t have to worry about dodging concrete trucks and breaking expensive equipment. /whinging

This perspective is simply the product of several bad hours and too little change of scenery. Things *will* be better tomorrow. I need to record moment’s like this so years from now when things have worked out and are smoother, I can laugh. Or at least not cry.

The Spirit of Giving and, Unrelated, the Cure for National Problems

17 Mar

Monday, Sandy and I were trying to get license plate renewal done for the year. Well, she was. Since I was still waiting on other dominoes to fall into place before I could make that step, I was pretty much along for the ride. On the way back to the house, she told me to let her know when I was ready to get all of the stuff done and she would write a blank check for me to do the process.

I was a little confused and wary. When I told her she didn’t have to she told me that Dad had been intending to anyway. I explained that they didn’t need to feel like they had to help me. She said they didn’t feel that way, they were just going to do it. It was really weird, and I was feeling particularly paranoid as I do whenever money issues come up. Just short of saying that I didn’t need the money or the help, I protested as much as I could about the offer. Because it WOULD have been helpful, even though I am not yet struggling for money, and I never asked for the help.

It’s weird how hard it is for me to accept help, even from family. I have to be in a pretty desperate situation. This pops up in my spiritual life at times, too, which is a topic for another time. Ironically, on the other hand, at times I have extremely high expectations of people. The scenarios for which my expectations and obstinate refusal manifest overlap, which adds to the confusion.

In this case, my paranoia was tingling because, maybe, it feels like if I take money from someone it will make me obligated to them in some way. It will allow them to have control over me. In reality, I think that “control” is only present when I become eaten up with guilt over accepting help in the first place. Like I owe that person something and they could ask it of me at any time.

I was thinking of something much more nebulous than this when we were still driving home when I channeled my other roommate Izzie, who was always counseling me to be less paranoid and afraid of such things. I asked myself, “What is the deal? Why IS it such a big deal?” This is cool because I’m not usually self-aware until the moment has passed. This time, though, I relented. I reminded myself that I did not ask for the help that was offered, and that it WOULD be helpful.

We were riding along, and I apologized for making a big deal about the situation and accepted her offer. She assured me that things were fine and the next day when my dominoes fell into place, she made good on it. I got my new car tag and title transfer courtesy of Sandy and Dad.

The other stray thought that occurred to me today was how awesome it is that I’ve been able to run and cycle so much. Day before yesterday I rode 7.5 miles around the area. Since I just started cycling regularly three weeks ago, this is pretty good! Yesterday I ran 3+ miles, upping my overall running time and recently I was running 8min miles, which is amazing and definitely PRish. Today I cycled 8 more miles. Even though I recently took a bad spill on the same bike, I’m really enjoying getting my heart going so much.

Afterwards, the thought that occurred to me was that if more people moved in with their family and spent the time they are unemployed not watching TV but out cycling or running or doing some kind of exercise, we’d have a few less problems in our country:
– less strain on government benefits
– less overall obesity in the country (which contributes to the above, as well, since people would not have to rely on so much healthcare!)

It was slightly facetious on my part, since I seriously doubt people would give up their independence on so many levels. It IS a good idea, though. It would work :)